Can You Be April Fooled?

Can You Be April Fooled? It's April, and you know what that means. Winter's done,the groundhog's catching some rays and those ugly Valentine'sDay Valentine's Day:see Saint Valentine's Day. Valentine's DayLovers' holiday celebrated on February 14, the feast day of St. Valentine, one of two 3rd-century Roman martyrs of the same name. St. rifts are finally healing. It's also a time of renewal. Peopleare renewing their vows to get off their generous behinds and startexercising. And career and technical educators like yourselves are backfrom spring break and ready to plunge into work with renewed vigor. In that spirit, we at Techniques challenge you with a pop quiz Noun 1. pop quiz - a quiz given without prior warningquiz - an examination consisting of a few short questions thattests your knowledge of some of the hippest entries from thatbestseller--the National School-to-Work Office's School-to-WorkGlossary of Terms--as well as a few others. We've picked 12 of thecatchiest forms of "educationese" we could find, and in eachcase we've mixed in three phoney answers with the right one. Circle all 12 correctly and you get ... well, nothing. Let'sface it, this quiz isn't exactly the bar exam Noun 1. bar exam - an examination conducted at regular intervals to determine whether a candidate is qualified to practice law in a given jurisdiction; "applicants may qualify to take the New York bar examination by graduating from an approved law school"; "he passed . Match your responseswith the correct answers at the bottom of the facing page. Good luck,and have fun! Match each term with the correct definition. 1. "Benchmarking" A. the impression the human head leaves when bench pressing fails B. the continuous process of measuring products, services andpractices against strong competitors or recognized leaders C. when those darn kids etch their names in the lab equipment D. flop follow-up to the hit 1960s single,"Barefootin'" 2. "All aspects of industry" A. downsizing (1) Converting mainframe and mini-based systems to client/server LANs.(2) To reduce equipment and associated costs by switching to a less-expensive system. (jargon) downsizing , outsourcing and profit making B. Bill Gates (person) Bill Gates - William Henry Gates III, Chief Executive Officer of Microsoft, which he co-founded in 1975 with Paul Allen. In 1994 Gates is a billionaire, worth $9.35b and Microsoft is worth about $27b. , everybody else C. every facet of an industry or industry sector a student ispreparing to enter--from planning and management to technical skills andsafety issues D. Dilbert, the pointy-haired boss The Pointy-Haired Boss (often abbreviated to just PHB) is Dilbert's boss in the Dilbert comic strip. He is notable for his gross incompetence and unawareness of his surroundings, yet somehow retains power in the workplace. , Dogbert and Ratbert 3. "Compact" A. contracts among community leaders to work to initiate andsustain local educational reform B. former U.S. Labor Secretary Robert Reich C. a Shriner's mode of transportation D. Danny DeVito Daniel Michael DeVito Jr. (born November 17, 1944) is an Emmy Award-winning American actor, director, and an Oscar-nominated producer, who first gained prominence for his portrayal of "Louie De Palma" on the popular ABC and NBC TV series Taxi (1978–1983). 4. "Connecting activities" A. linking dots or changing planes Changing Planes (ISBN 0-15-100971-6) is a collection of short stories in the best tradition of Ursula LeGuin. More ethnography than science fiction, each chapter describes a different world populated by a society completely unlike and yet eerily similar to our own. , to the extremely literal-minded B. programs that link school- and work-based educational programs C. the official newsletter of the joiners union D. if we have to tell you, it's been way too long sinceyou've had a date 5. "Cooperative education Please note that Co-operative education can also refer to education about Co-operative societies. For this usage, please refer to Co-operative studies.The examples and perspective in this article or section may not represent a worldwide view " A. when Professor Mike Tyson urges his students to "get withthe program" B. the course that tells you way more than you ever wanted to knowabout member-owned and -operated organizations C. the next course after "grudgingly willing education" D. a structured method of instruction whereby students alternate orcoordinate their high school or postsecondary studies with a job in afield related to their academic or occupational objectives 6. "Dual enrollment" A. a program of study allowing high school students tosimultaneously earn credits toward a high school diploma A high school diploma is a diploma awarded for the completion of high school. In the United States and Canada, it is considered the minimum education required for government jobs and higher education. An equivalent is the GED. and apostsecondary degree or certificate B. a course cowboys must take before their first big showdown C. a mistake on Alexander Hamilton's part D. the amazing David Copperfield sits in two different classroomsat the same time--or does he? 7. "Job shadowing" A. what groundhogs do for a living B. career exploration activity in which a student follows anemployee at a firm for one or more days to learn about a particularoccupation or industry C. a prerequisite skill for enrolling in the International Academyof Mimes D. what Cal Ripken's understudies were doing throughout the2,632 games of "The Streak" 8. "Occupational cluster" A. a confection con��fec��tionn.A sweetened medicinal compound. Also called electuary. of chewy chew��y?adj. chew��i��er, chew��i��estNeeding much chewing: chewy candy.chewi��ness n. nougat nou��gat?n.A confection made from a sugar or honey paste into which nuts are mixed.[French, from Proven?al, from nougo, nut, from Old Proven?al noga, from Vulgar Latin , creamy caramel and rich milkchocolate so yummy it's a real job to put it down B. a collection of six or more office cubicles in less than 50square feet of space C. spots where many people from one occupation gather--such asjournalists at bars, lawyers at accident sites and paparazzi pa��pa��raz��zo?n. pl. pa��pa��raz��ziA freelance photographer who doggedly pursues celebrities to take candid pictures for sale to magazines and newspapers. inimmediate proximity to any supermodel D. a grouping of occupations from one or more industries that shareskill requirements 9. "Rubrics" A. tools for assessing instruction and performance according topredetermined pre��de��ter��mine?v. pre��de��ter��mined, pre��de��ter��min��ing, pre��de��ter��minesv.tr.1. To determine, decide, or establish in advance: expectations and criteria B. the next Fox Claymation sitcom, starring a foul-mouthed familyfrom the sticks C. the brainiac whose stupid cube we still can't solve after20 years D. has no actual meaning, but users think it makes them soundreally smart 10. "Service learning" A. the politically correct politically correctPolitically sensitive adjectiveReferring to language reflecting awareness and sensitivity to another person's physical, mental, cultural, or other disadvantages or deviations from a norm; a person is not mentally retarded, but term for separate Girl Scout and BoyScout camping trips B. an instructional method that combines community service with aschool-based opportunity for reflection about that service C. Military History 101 D. Letitia Baldridge's guide to equipping oneself for the mostexquisite tea party 11. "SCANS" A. Secretary's Commission on Achieving Necessary Skills B. Super Creepy Annihilating an��ni��hi��late?v. an��ni��hi��lat��ed, an��ni��hi��lat��ing, an��ni��hi��latesv.tr.1. a. To destroy completely: The naval force was annihilated during the attack. Neurotic Skeletons--the schlock-horrorclassic from the same studio that brought you C.H.U.D. (Cannibalistic can��ni��bal?n.1. A person who eats the flesh of other humans.2. An animal that feeds on others of its own kind.[From Spanish Can��balis, Humanoid Underground Dwellers) C. space-age supermarket checkout technology that wowed PresidentBush D. a line of minimalist Swedish furniture 12. "Tech prep" A. actor/author William Shatner's novel about a futuristicworld in which brave centurions prepare for battle by conspicuouslydying their hair and furiously sucking in their guts B. the term biblical scholars have assigned Noah's"2+2" system for repopulating the world after the big flood C. arming yourself with an anti-glare computer monitor, ergonomicmouse and plenty of RAM D. name given to programs that offer at least four years ofsequential coursework at the secondary and postsecondary levels toprepare students for technical careers Key to scoring: 12--Congratulations! You've proven you have what it takes toeliminate three ridiculous choices and choose the right one in eachcase. Now all you have to do is spend every last "spare"moment over the next year putting together a portfolio and studyingeverything there is to know about your field, and you'll be on yourway to certification in vocational education by the National Board forProfessional Teaching Standards and, hopefully, a big pay raise to goalong with the prestige. 8-11--Close, but no gold star for you. Which questions slipped youup? The one about "service learning" being a course inmilitary history? Hey, that sounded logical, right? We thought that onewas pretty clever. And, did you catch that play on the name of WilliamShatner's Tekwar novel series in question No. 127 (Ha! We killourselves!) 4-7--So Chief, how long did you say you've been in this job?Your score suggests you're not quite up to speed on practical,hands-on learning. Maybe you're a recovering academic teacherwho's just starting in career and technical education. Is that it?If so, repeat and take to heart the following serenity prayer:"Lord grant me the peace to accept that change is constant, thecourage to keep my students at the cutting edge of workplace trends andthe wisdom to know I make a huge difference in the lives ofstudents." Now settle down and clear your head of all that roteteaching nonsense. You're going to be just fine. 1-3--This is not good. It seems that your mind is already on summervacation. You probably think "block scheduling" is theappointment you've made this month with the income tax-filingexperts. O--Lights out. Nobody home. We suspect a counselor put you on thegeneral track back in high school and you've been wanderingaimlessly aim��less?adj.Devoid of direction or purpose.aimless��ly adv.aim ever since. How did you get ahold of this magazine, anyway? Westrongly suggest you put it back on that technology teacher's deskbefore he knows it's missing. Answers: 1. B, 2. C, 3. A, 4. B, 5. D, 6. A, 7. B, 8. D, 9. A, 10.B, 11. A, 12. D